Fortean Slips: Kirk Loves Spock

Kirk Loves Spock

by D. Trull
Enigma Editor
dtrull@parascope.com

I'm a Star Trek fan, but I only like the original show and the first six movies. (Well, mainly just the even-numbered ones.) A lot of people have a hard time understanding that. They argue that the old show was clearly inferior for a multitude of reasons: cheesy stories, cheap sets, fake-looking aliens, crappy special effects, Klingons without lobster heads, Shatner, and so on. But let me tell you something: the old Trek had heart. That much is evident in the relationship between Kirk and Spock, who demonstrated that analytical reasoning and two-fisted whoop-ass could work together in harmony, as an unbeatable team. Nothing in all the Trek spinoffs has been nearly as compelling as that marvelous yin-and-yang friendship between man and Vulcan, if you ask me.

Even though Kirk and Spock have been officially retired from active Starfleet duty, their voyages still continue in a whole different final frontier: the fertile imaginations of faithful Trekkers. Star Trek is one of the top subjects of fan fiction, amateur stories written about popular characters from movies and TV shows that are distributed via fanzines and the Internet. Some fan fiction hews close to its source materials, but writers often veer off in bold new directions, heedless of the neutral zones of continuity and copyrights. For instance, there is an entire subgenre devoted to taking the friendship of Kirk and Spock to its ultimate expression -- by making them into lovers.

I know, I know, you're probably thinking I've gotten so desperate for something weird to poke fun at that I've resorted to plundering sleazy Internet schlock-porn. When I first heard about this romantic Kirk and Spock stuff, I thought it was trash and not worth writing about, but it turns out to be a lot more complex and surprising than your run-of-the-mill cybersmut. I hope no one jumps to the conclusion that this article is homophobic, either. Now back to our story.

The category of fan fiction in question is known as "slash." One FAQ list defines slash as "fan-written fiction that posits that characters of the same sex from a media show are sexually involved with each other." The name derives from the practice of indicating the initials of the characters who get intimate in a given story, such as "K/S," or Kirk "slash" Spock. The term has also been intellectualized as having connotations of "slashing" into the hidden subtext of conventional pop culture iconography and so forth. Fan fiction about speculative romances between characters of opposite sexes is called "het," or "gen," which I guess means "general" or "generic."

Slash first appeared in printed fanzines in the 1970s, and the genre has found an ideal medium in the online world. There's even a Yahoo! category devoted to slash. It's generally agreed that the first slash ever written was based on Star Trek. While other science-fiction and adventure series have become the predominant material for slash, including Starsky and Hutch, Miami Vice, The X-Files (think Mulder and Skinner), and a futuristic British series called Blake's 7, the classic homoerotic pairing of Kirk and Spock remains a perennial favorite.

K/S slash generally involves one of the two old buddies finding the conviction to confess his longtime secret admiration for the other, or spontaneously making an aggressive physical advance. Virtually every story is a "first time" experience, which is a de rigueur ingredient in slash. There are web sites and fanzines made up of nothing but first-time K/S slash, each and every story restoring Kirk and Spock's private regions as places where no man has gone before.

So what are these stories actually like? I've only examined a few pieces of slash, since it's really not my cup of tea, but the following excerpt from "Good Lovin'," written by Greywolf the Wanderer, seems like a fair example of K/S:

       The lift doors swished shut behind them, and Jim yawned, and ordered it to Deck 5. He blinked, and rubbed his eyes. "I thought this shift was *never* going to end," he groused.
       Spock favoured him with a quizzical look, and a raised eyebrow. "I do not understand, Jim. The shift was the same length as it always is." There might have been the faintest twinkle, just then, in the black eyes.
       Jim groaned, knowing that he was being teased again. Then he raised his own eyebrow, and shot back, "You know *exactly* what I mean, Spock." He wouldn't *say* he'd been bored, of course. Every spacer knows that's just asking for trouble. Nonetheless, bored is exactly what he'd been, and all damned day, at that.        Spock's other eyebrow joined its partner, and now there was definitely a twinkle in those knowing black eyes. "I see," murmured the Vulcan, his deep voice doing the most *interesting* things to Jim's insides. "If I understand you correctly, you are expressing a wish to be entertained, or excited." He leaned over and activated the lift controls. "All stop. Authorization Spock Beta One, Alpha Two, 279." He turned to face the human, and allowed the corners of his mouth to quirk into that faint half-smile he reserved for Jim alone. "Perhaps I can be of assistance..."
       "In a *turbolift*?" Jim was grinning now, feeling horny and embarrassed all at once. "Uh, Spock..."
       Two very warm fingers were laid across his lips, shushing him. "Jim. Do you trust me?"
       "Of course I do. But what..."
       "Then allow me to demonstrate, t'hy'la." No sooner said than done, and Jim found himself pressed against the wall of the turbolift, wrapped in a fierce warm hug, and being kissed within an inch of his life. His initial surprise was rapidly replaced by arousal, heat pooling in his belly and filling his groin. Suddenly it seemed too hot in here -- but god, it felt *good*. He returned the hug, brushing his hips against the Vulcan, enjoying the sensation of the tight uniform pants restraining his suddenly eager [...]

Well, you get the idea. Pretty much what you'd expect. But now let's get to what might be the oddest and most surprising thing about slash. By all accounts, slash is by and large written by women, for women. And they're mostly heterosexual. Of course, people can claim to be whatever gender they want to on the Internet, and there are gay and straight men who are into slash, but for the most part it appears to be a girl thing.

But why? After all, science fiction, pornography, the Internet and gay male relationships are all areas of interest traditionally dominated by men. The issue of why slash is dominated by women is the sort of question that master's theses can (and have) been written about, and not even slash authors can explain exactly why they do it. It is, if you'll pardon the expression, most illogical.

There are plenty of psychobabble-packed theories on the subject that toss around phrases like "deconstructing social meta-texts" and "interrogating the patriarchal values of masculinity." But in accordance with Occam's razor, I think the best explanations are the simplest ones. First off, most fan fiction in general is written by women. Whereas men are turned on by visual pornography, women prefer narrative erotica, in which a meaningful relationship builds into a sexual encounter. Romance novels fill that desire for many women, but for women who enjoy science fiction and fantasy rather than bodice-rippers, there is a distinct void. These genres almost never venture into explicit sexuality, leaving the complex character relationships that develop over the course of a series hanging tantalizingly unrequited. Thus the motivation for women to turn to erotic fan fiction, as a means of filling in those blanks.

But what's the source of the wild enthusiasm for turning characters gay? The most common reasoning is that the best characters in mainstream science fiction are the men, owing to some institutionalized sexism that prevents female characters from being made very interesting. So slash writers find it more satisfying to pair up the guys. The problem with this theory is that there's also a lot of lesbian slash, frequently based on Star Trek: Voyager and Xena: Warrior Princess (whoa, big surprise there).

Another explanation for the appeal of slash is less intellectual. "My best guess is that if one man is a turn on, then two men are doubly so," one slash fan reasoned. After all, it seems normal for a man to enjoy the scenario of two women pretending to be lesbians, so maybe it shouldn't seem so unearthly for Kirk and Spock to be outed in a fantasy for women. Slash even derives from the higher moral level of characterization and inner emotion, rather than the anonymity of naked, writhing bodies, which is surely proven by a moment's contemplation of the physiques of William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy.

As I mentioned before, my first reaction to slash was a negative one. I was ready to tell these people to get a life, make up their own gay science-fiction characters, and leave Kirk and Spock alone. But we should be open-minded toward new worlds and new civilizations, and slash ain't really that bad, as pornography goes: it requires thought and creativity, it's free on the Internet, no living persons have to get exploited to produce it, and it must annoy the crap out of a bunch of big evil copyright-holding corporations. May it live long and prosper.

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