Did David Letterman really hypnotize "Late Show" stage manager BiffHenderson? Dave the Hyp-Mo-Tist? From the Files of Fortean Slips by D. Trull Enigma Editor dtrull@parascope.com A bitter controversy is tearing through the nation like a fiery chainsaw, forcing us all to sort truth from deception in a conflict that will reverberate through the ages. Well, maybe not, but the question's been enough to keep us geeks on alt.fan.letterman hopping like crazed monkeys: Did David Letterman hypnotize Biff Henderson? Henderson, "Late Show" stage manager, has long been a popular participant in Letterman comedy bits, including the remarkable "Biff Henderson's Golf Cart of Death." But on a recent program the comedy went awry, as Letterman mistakenly sent the beloved stage manager into a deep hypnotic trance. Or did he? Fortean Slips has been unable to obtain verification on what was real and what was make-believe on that fateful night in the Ed Sullivan Theater. The following is a summary of what unfolded before the home viewers. The April 5 "Late Show" featured hypnotist Marshall Sylver, internationally recognized for his Las Vegas stage shows and infomercials. In segments taped earlier, Letterman watched as Sylver hypnotized Henderson and a "Late Show" intern. After putting Henderson in a deep trance using the command "Sleep!", Sylver planted the suggestion for Henderson to burst into laughter at the subject of Letterman's salary, and it worked. Conversely, Sylver made the intern grow furious at the thought of Letterman's exorbitant paycheck. Following the pre-taped segments (which could have been rigged, although most would agree that they were probably genuine), Letterman took to imitating Sylver's distinctive trance command. As he is wont to do with a non sequitur phrase he finds amusing, Letterman shouted "SLEEP! SLEEP!" over and over, gazing at Henderson with mock-hypnotic, "skunk-eye" expressions. Henderson, standing off-camera at his stage manager post, looked distressed and waved for Letterman to stop. But Letterman only picked up the pace, yelling "SLEEP, BIFF! SLEEP!" Before long, Henderson staggered the few feet to Letterman's desk, and collapsed into the guest chair, unconscious. Letterman seemed anxious and bewildered, asking what he should do next. He was advised to go ahead and read the Top Ten list, but ridiculed the lack of compassion for the fallen stage manager and refused to go on as if nothing was wrong. Henderson remained completely inert, and close-ups of his face showed no expression despite the din of confusion around him. Following a sudden commercial break, Henderson still appeared not to have moved. Letterman now had hypnotist Sylver on the phone for assistance. He followed Sylver's instructions to gently assure Biff that everything would be all right when he awoke. At Letterman's count of three, Henderson came to. He looked extremely groggy and out of sorts, but was able to get back to work. So: was it real or was it fake? The question of whether Letterman re-hypnotized Biff Henderson is a labyrinthine web of conspiracy and conjecture that may never be unraveled. One can hope for Oliver Stone's "SLEEP," starring John Michael Higgins and Nipsey Russell. In the interest of equal time, here for your consideration are the best arguments for each side. From the home office at ParaScope... TOP TEN REASONS WHY THE BIFF HYPNOSIS THING WAS FAKE 10. C'mon, this is LETTERMAN! Of course it was fake! 9. Thousands of Americans lose consciousness nightly while listening to Dave, and THAT ain't hypnosis, Chester 8. Infomercial huckster Marshall Sylver is one cheesy-ass hypnotist 7. Dave was "conveniently" able to get Sylver on the phone to help in this "unexpected" emergency 6. A camera was backstage to show the intern guy who was also hypnotized earlier, konked out by Dave's "SLEEP" commands like Biff 5. Two words: pre-show cocktails 4. Biff fell asleep because he accidentally tuned his headset to a Mets game 3. Biff fell asleep because he accidentally tuned his headset to Dave's comedy bit 2. There was a second hypnotist on the grassy knoll behind Paul 1. The most powerful man in American broadcasting can do whatever the hell he wants TOP TEN REASON WHY DAVE REALLY HYPNOTIZED BIFF 10. It sure did LOOK real! 9. Internet commentators who claim to have been in the audience report that Biff was in fact motionless during the commercial break, while frenzied staffers ran around trying to cope with the crisis 8. Someone named "Shecky" who is apparently a "Late Show" staffer gave his assurance on alt.fan.letterman that the episode was not staged 7. The intern guy backstage was really hypnotized by Dave, too, according to Shecky 6. Although his cue-card skills may outstrip those of Calvert DeForest, Biff Henderson ain't no actor 5. Dave didn't joke around about it afterwards, like he would have were it fake 4. The unplanned chaos made this Letterman's first show since moving to CBS to have no Top Ten List 3. Biff, who used to work for NASA (seriously!), is implanted with a federal employee mind-control chip which Dave accidentally triggered 2. Dave knows all about what it means to feel like you've been hyp-mo-tized 1. The most powerful man in American broadcasting can do whatever the hell he wants (c) Copyright 1996 ParaScope, Inc. Next: Clinton's Mummy Love Fortean Slips Index What do you think? Tell us in the message boards!